Welcome, December

I can't believe it's already December. Time goes by so fast. Like a blink of an eye. I've been quite upset lately. I miss my baby, that's for sure. And I lost my favourite jacket :'( It's been with me before my dad passed away and while I was with Ass. So, it means so much to me, and now it's missing. Mum took me shopping to make me feel better. I bought a lot of clothings bla bla bla but nothing can make me feel any better. That jacket is everything in the world to me. Hmm... :'(
So yeah, that jacket and I, we've been through an awful lot of wisdom. It's been through a lot of things with me. Tears, stench, body odour, mucus, blood, sweat etc. Hahaha. I know I sound more likely to be a lunatic for being so sentimental about a piece of clothing. But yeah, that's just how much I value things. That's just me. Everything has it's own value. Not by its price. But by how much it means to you. Like a loved one for example. Someone you've known and been through everything together for a long period of time. Would you care if your loved one disappeared? Won't you be looking for him/her? I mean, shouldn't you? Aren't you supposed to care? Won't you be worried? Won't you feel the difference? Like as if there's a missing piece of puzzle. I mean, usually, it's the loved ones that keeps you going. That's why we have friends, companionships, lovers etc. And to me, that jacket is more like a companionship on terms of objects or unliving things if you want to put it that way. I'm very sentimental about my things, my properties and my belongings. Including all that which is personal to me.

So anyway, obviously, I'm still wide awake. That's just me, you know. I always have trouble sleeping. It's commonly ordinary to me. But others find it a bit weird. Got nothing to say about that. I chatted with an old friend of mine. We haven't seen each other for ages. But from her pictures, I'd say she's getting gorgeous. Like, if she was at a cocktail party, you wouldn't miss her. She's be noticed in every corner of the room. Her beauty is simply eye-catching and breathtaking. So yeah, nevermind about that. Hahah. I can't continue. Cause I'm actually drooling. hahaha. Anyway, we were going out for dinner, and I couldn't take my eyes off her. I've never seen such beauty. I know I sound too deep right now. But that's just how I am as well. Everything that surrounds me just fascinates me. Back to the story. She was telling me about her life so far, and every word she spoke automatically took my every interest. She's very well educated, smart, beautiful. If only she was untouched. I mean, like a sculpture. Okay. I'm being too deep and I highly doubt you understand what I'm saying. I'm just very attracted to the beauty of Art. Some artists think that by using Art as a weapon, they can change the world. Do you believe that? I'm not sure I do. But all I want to do is enjoy everything around me. It's not much. But it's worth it. It's more like an assignment for collecting ideas.

Enough with all that art crap. Let's move on. Don't get me wrong. I do love art. But, I've exaggerated too much. I don't really know what it's for.
So, since it's already december, I've been thinking of my New Year's resolutions. Hmm.... Should I change for the better? Or the good? I just want to be my very best. Even during the Holidays, I still feel pressured. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? I just want to be one of those succesfully accomplished women by the time I've grown up into adulthood. If only I could pay much more attention in classes and focus with my studies. It's just so hard. Especially for someone like me. I get fascinated over little things easily. It's a good and a bad thing because firstly, fascination leads to a certain interest. But, instead of concentration, it would be considered as distraction from paying attention. It's not wrong to be fascinated by the beauty of God's creation but, at times it has its limits. That's why I stated that it's both a good and a bad thing.

Ahh, all this talk is wearing me out. I'm not sleepy. I'm just tired and I not to save up my energy for work tomorrow. I hope my baby's alright. Ass slept earlier ago. I think. I don't know. I just hope he's fine. Baby, I love you so much. Te Quiero Con Toda Mi Alma, Mi Amor.