Welcome, December

I can't believe it's already December. Time goes by so fast. Like a blink of an eye. I've been quite upset lately. I miss my baby, that's for sure. And I lost my favourite jacket :'( It's been with me before my dad passed away and while I was with Ass. So, it means so much to me, and now it's missing. Mum took me shopping to make me feel better. I bought a lot of clothings bla bla bla but nothing can make me feel any better. That jacket is everything in the world to me. Hmm... :'(
So yeah, that jacket and I, we've been through an awful lot of wisdom. It's been through a lot of things with me. Tears, stench, body odour, mucus, blood, sweat etc. Hahaha. I know I sound more likely to be a lunatic for being so sentimental about a piece of clothing. But yeah, that's just how much I value things. That's just me. Everything has it's own value. Not by its price. But by how much it means to you. Like a loved one for example. Someone you've known and been through everything together for a long period of time. Would you care if your loved one disappeared? Won't you be looking for him/her? I mean, shouldn't you? Aren't you supposed to care? Won't you be worried? Won't you feel the difference? Like as if there's a missing piece of puzzle. I mean, usually, it's the loved ones that keeps you going. That's why we have friends, companionships, lovers etc. And to me, that jacket is more like a companionship on terms of objects or unliving things if you want to put it that way. I'm very sentimental about my things, my properties and my belongings. Including all that which is personal to me.

So anyway, obviously, I'm still wide awake. That's just me, you know. I always have trouble sleeping. It's commonly ordinary to me. But others find it a bit weird. Got nothing to say about that. I chatted with an old friend of mine. We haven't seen each other for ages. But from her pictures, I'd say she's getting gorgeous. Like, if she was at a cocktail party, you wouldn't miss her. She's be noticed in every corner of the room. Her beauty is simply eye-catching and breathtaking. So yeah, nevermind about that. Hahah. I can't continue. Cause I'm actually drooling. hahaha. Anyway, we were going out for dinner, and I couldn't take my eyes off her. I've never seen such beauty. I know I sound too deep right now. But that's just how I am as well. Everything that surrounds me just fascinates me. Back to the story. She was telling me about her life so far, and every word she spoke automatically took my every interest. She's very well educated, smart, beautiful. If only she was untouched. I mean, like a sculpture. Okay. I'm being too deep and I highly doubt you understand what I'm saying. I'm just very attracted to the beauty of Art. Some artists think that by using Art as a weapon, they can change the world. Do you believe that? I'm not sure I do. But all I want to do is enjoy everything around me. It's not much. But it's worth it. It's more like an assignment for collecting ideas.

Enough with all that art crap. Let's move on. Don't get me wrong. I do love art. But, I've exaggerated too much. I don't really know what it's for.
So, since it's already december, I've been thinking of my New Year's resolutions. Hmm.... Should I change for the better? Or the good? I just want to be my very best. Even during the Holidays, I still feel pressured. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? I just want to be one of those succesfully accomplished women by the time I've grown up into adulthood. If only I could pay much more attention in classes and focus with my studies. It's just so hard. Especially for someone like me. I get fascinated over little things easily. It's a good and a bad thing because firstly, fascination leads to a certain interest. But, instead of concentration, it would be considered as distraction from paying attention. It's not wrong to be fascinated by the beauty of God's creation but, at times it has its limits. That's why I stated that it's both a good and a bad thing.

Ahh, all this talk is wearing me out. I'm not sleepy. I'm just tired and I not to save up my energy for work tomorrow. I hope my baby's alright. Ass slept earlier ago. I think. I don't know. I just hope he's fine. Baby, I love you so much. Te Quiero Con Toda Mi Alma, Mi Amor.

Story Of The Week

I don't have much to say actually. On Monday, I hung out with my girls. Wednesday, went out with my Baby. Thursday, I went out with Dice to get ourselves a haircut. Today, I hung out with Dave and Raymond at Chill. So, basically, everything occured in Gadong.
Here are some pictures.

Out with me and my girlies :)

Dice was so kusut when he had his haircut. He even managed to pose. :P

This is Dave and Raymond (Y)

DAVEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! :D

Why is it so complicated?

I don't know how to start actually. It's late, obviously. Somehow, I still can't figure out why these eyes won't shut. I haven't been sleeping well for days. Insomnia? Probably. I hope not. I'm currently chatting with my baby. (L) EEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I love you so much wah yo! Hahaha. Like I said, baby. "Let me lie down on your chest and listen to your heart beating as you hold me in your arms and make me feel safe." :)
Anyway, I went out with my girls days ago which was on Monday. We never thought we'd ever hang out on a Monday. We usually go out on Thursday Nights and Saturday Nights. Sadly, I can't spend time with them on Thursdays' and Saturdays' because I'm working during those days. Bummer, huh? Oh well, what can I do about it? Responsibilities comes first. Mmmmyeah.
I've been feeling really crappy all day today. I don't know why. I was so blank...... completely. It's weird. It's like a mind tease as well. Ahh.. I cried last night. Until I lost my contact lens. Kirakan ganas jua sudah tu ku menangis aah. So yeah. Mum bought me a new pair. The sales assistant said, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to say you have estigmatism. But the toric contact lens you need for the right side of your eye is currently unavailable. I will give you the normal contact lens, but it will not be as clear as wearing eyeglasses." So yeah, I was like.. "Um.. Really? How much has my degree increased?" And she said, "for your right eye, from -2.50 to -4.00 and for your left, from -2.75 to -3.25." And I was like, "Whoa!" Hahah. Yes, mummy. I'll start eating my carrots. I don't like carrots, actually. It has that bizzare taste. Well, for me. I don't know about you guys. I love eating Caesar salad and other green vegetables(including the purple coloured ones), but not carrots.
Right now, I'm listening to Until the end of time by Justin timberlake and Beyonce'. Hmm.. I miss my baby so much. No no.. I will not cry again. I don't want want another pair of contact lens to go missing again.
Anyway, I'm thinking of making a new email. My current email is getting lame. And a lot of people complain that it's too long. Letmebeyoureffingballerina@hotmail.com? Does that seem long to you? Oh well, no need to answer that. Hahah.
Oh well, I'm blank now. Will update more soon. Gidday, Mate! :)

A little something from me to you

I just want you to know that I love only you, baby. Just you. And it's so true. I am totally in love with you. :')

Busybusybusy

So far, I've been caught up with work lately. That's one of the very good reason why I haven't been blogging. I've been so busy, I got caugt up with a lot of things. Anyway, I'm not working today. So yeah. I got some free time for blogging. I'm currently working at Chill which is located at The Mall, Gadong. I'm working as a part-time waitress. Hey, it's better working than doing nothing during the holidays. And plus, I need the extra pocket money. I can't keep on depending on my mother's money. Not only that, I want to learn how to earn money by myself. At least I'm commited to it. If not, I'd be a spoiled brat by now. No offense, my intention is not to offend anyone in particular. I'm just saying it on my own behalf.
Currently, I'm missing someone. We just had our 3rd Monthsary yesterday. It was fabulous. I never had an amazing Monthsary before. Oh, baby. I thank you so much for such an amazing day. It means so much to me. I love you so much, Ass :') That was the first romantic outing ever. If only you could've focused a lot on me than football. pfft. Oh well, at least we had fun. Mmm... I'll treasure that moment in me forever, baby. I love you so much. So so very much :')
Right this very minute, I'm kind of thinking. What am I gonna do tomorrow? I have absolutely no plans nor even anything to do at all. Hmm.. I think I should just rest at home since I'll be woring the very next day. I'm only woring four times a week, which is Thursdays' till Sundays'. It's a tough job. Especially on weekends. There's always a crowd. You have no idea. It does seem like a simple and boring job, but hey, I don't mind woring six hours a day. It's worth it :)

Badminton.

I was looking through Abi's blog. And I found one of my picture during the badminton tournament which was held at PTEB last april. I looked horrible. Didn't know he took a shot of it. So anyway, I took the picture. Sorry, Abi. I forgot to link you. hahah.

Hello, Earthlings.

As you all heard, well, some of you. hahah. I've recovered from an emotional breakdown. I haven't fully recovered though. Little by little. It's nearly 1:30 am. I can't sleep. I've been feeling so fucked up lately. Hmm.. I kinda miss school and that tall, sexy ninja that used to stalk me around. Mmm... I miss you :/ So yeah, I'm bored and took pictures of myself. Wanna take a look? Here you go.

So yeahh, that's Nani in boredom mode. Hahaha. Recently, I chatted with my best buddy, Dice. He's an awesome friend. He's changed so much. In a good way. We chatted this one night. And, he managed to make me laugh. I was really upset at that time. Luckily he was there to make me feel better. Otherwise, who knows what might happen. I was really stressed out. Anyway, he knew I'd blog about this so he said, "Hello, Earthlings. "

Oh, guess what? I've managed to get a part time job. I can't tell you where. But for those who's faces are always seen in Gadong, you'll figure out where I'm working. And if you do know, just keep it low. Hahah. I'm gonna start working this Thursday. Aaaah. Can't wait for my first day. This is the newest beginning of another new experience. (Y)

I'm kinda missing someone right now. I bet you know who you are. Sayang, I'm sorry for what I said earlier. I was so stupid. I've always been stupid. Mmm, I love you so much! And I'm really really sorry. :/ Nani misses you, ya'know?

A dedication to the bored and jobless.

I'm so bored like hell. I'm currently cahtting with my baby. It goes a little something like this:

Ass. just sent you a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

Ass. says (6:07 PM):
behh
Ass. says (6:07 PM):

:)
Nani says (6:07 PM):
apakan nudge nudge ani?
Ass. says (6:07 PM):
i Love you man.
Ass. says (6:07 PM):
haha
Nani says (6:07 PM):
i love you too wah dude.

hahah. Well, that's my baby. I love my baby to teenyweeny bits.

Anyway, I had an all-boring day today. Been missing my baby. Ahh.. And I miss my baby girls. Nabilah Rosli, Piyawan Takamchai and Nabilah Hazirah Karim. I know I know. I've alredy met them last night. Piya, Zye and I watched The Coffin. It was awesome! It could've been better if nabs was with us as well. But oh well, at least we had fun. It's not Nabs's fault she had to go home early.

My mind is so messed up right now. For I don't know what reason. I mean, exam's over. What more should I be thinking about? Hmm.. Maybe it's because I miss my baby too much.

I did this little discovery. I'm really into all sorts of reptiles. It all started when I disected a lizard when I was 5 years old. I'm not a criminal or a weirdo, okay? I was just amazed when I saw its tail was still moving eventhough it was disconnected to the other remainings of its tail. So, it made me thought. Why not cut its body to half. And I did. I remembered I saw somethinhg white-ish looking in it. I think it was an egg. Oh well. Anyway, I have this huge interest in snakes, lizards, dinosaurs etc. My favourite reptile is the Komodo Dragon. So far, I can't get enough of that thing. I know its deadly and everything. But I'd like to have the opportunity to study that deadly creature someday. The Komodo dragon (Varanus komodoensis) is a species of lizard that inhabits the islands of Komodo, Rincaa, Floress, Gili Motang , and Gili Dasami, in central Indonesia. A member of the monitor lizard family (Varanidae), it is the largest living species of lizard, growing to an average length of 2 to 3 metres (6.6 to 9.8 ft) and weighing around 70 kilograms (150 lb). Their unusual size is attributed to island gigantism, since there are no other carnivorous animals to fill the niche on the islands where they live, and also to the Komodo dragon's low metabolic rate. As a result of their size, these lizards are apex predators, dominating the ecosystems in which they live. Although Komodo dragons eat mostly carrion, they will also hunt and ambush prey including invertebrates, birds, and mammals.

It's quite a rare species. You don't find it very often. The Komodo dragon started with the Varanus genus, which originated in Asia about 40 million years ago and migrated to Australia. Around 15 million years ago, a collision between Australia and Southeast Asia allowed the varanids to move into what is now the Indonesian archipelago. The Komodo dragon is believed to have differentiated from its Australian ancestors 4 million years ago, extending their range to as far east as the island of Timor. The ice age and its dramatic sea level changes brought the islands that the Komodo dragons inhabited into their present locations, isolating them in their present range.

The Komodo dragon does not have a particularly acute sense of hearing, despite its visible earholes, and is only able to hear sounds between 400 and 2000 hertz. It is able to see as far away as 300 metres which is about 980ft. , but because its retinas only contain cones, it is thought to have poor night vision. The Komodo dragon is able to see in color, but has poor visual discrimination of stationary objects. The Komodo dragon uses its tongue to detect taste and smell stimuli, as with many other reptiles, with the vomeronasal sense using a Jacobson's organ, a sense that aids navigation in the dark. With the help of a favorable wind and its habit of swinging its head from side to side as it walks, Komodo dragons may be able to detect carrion from 4–9.5 kilometres (2.5–6 mi) away. The dragon's nostrils are not of great use for smelling, as the animal does not have a diaphragm. It only has a few taste buds in the back of its throat. Its scales, some of which are reinforced with bone, have sensory plaques connected to nerves that facilitate its sense of touch. The scales around the ears, lips, chin, and soles of the feet may have three or more sensory plaques. The Komodo dragon was formerly thought to be deaf when a study reported no agitation in wild Komodo dragons in response to whispers, raised voices, or shouts.

The Komodo dragon prefers hot and dry places, and typically lives in dry open grassland, savanna, and tropical forest at low elevations. As an ectotherm, it is most active in the day, although it exhibits some nocturnal activity. Komodo dragons are largely solitary, coming together only to breed and eat. They are capable of running rapidly in brief sprints up to 20 kilometres per hour (12.4 mph), diving up to 4.5 metres (15 ft), and climbing trees proficiently when young through use of their strong claws. To catch prey that is out of reach, the Komodo dragon may stand on its hind legs and use its tail as a support. As the Komodo dragon matures, its claws are used primarily as weapons, as its great size makes climbing impractical.

For shelter, the Komodo dragon digs holes that can measure from 1–3 metres (3–10 ft) wide with its powerful forelimbs and claws. Because of its large size and habit of sleeping in these burrows, it is able to conserve body heat throughout the night and minimize its basking period the morning after. The Komodo dragon typically hunts in the afternoon, but stays in the shade during the hottest part of the day. These special resting places, usually located on ridges with a cool sea breeze, are marked with droppings and are cleared of vegetation. They also serve as a strategic location from which to ambush deer.

Komodo dragons are carnivores. Although they eat mostly carrion, they will also ambush live prey with a stealthy approach. When suitable prey arrives near a dragon's ambush site, it will suddenly charge at the animal and go for the underside or the throat. It is able to locate its prey using its keen sense of smell, which can locate a dead or dying animal from a range of up to 9.5 kilometers (6 miles). Komodo dragons have also been observed knocking down large pigs and deer with their strong tail.

Komodo dragons eat by tearing large chunks of flesh and swallowing them whole while holding the carcass down with their forelegs. For smaller prey up to the size of a goat, their loosely articulated jaws, flexible skull, and expandable stomach allow it to swallow its prey whole. The vegetable contents of the stomach and intestines are typically avoided. Copious amounts of red saliva that the Komodo dragons produce helps to lubricate the food, but swallowing is still a long process (15–20 minutes to swallow a goat). Komodo dragons may attempt to speed up the process by ramming the carcass against a tree to force it down its throat, sometimes ramming so forcefully that the tree is knocked down. To prevent itself from suffocating while swallowing, it breathes using a small tube under the tongue that connects to the lungs. After eating up to 80 percent of its body weight in one meal, it drags itself to a sunny location to speed digestion, as the food could rot and poison the dragon if left undigested for too long. Because of their slow metabolism, large dragons can survive on as little as 12 meals a year. After digestion, the Komodo dragon regurgitates a mass of horns, hair, and teeth known as the gastric pellet, which is covered in malodorous mucus. After regurgitating the gastric pellet, it rubs its face in the dirt or on bushes to get rid of the mucus, suggesting that it, like humans, does not relish the scent of its own excretions.

The largest animals generally eat first, while the smaller ones follow a hierarchy. The largest male asserts his dominance and the smaller males show their submission by use of body language and rumbling hisses. Dragons of equal size may resort to "wrestling." Losers usually retreat, though have been known to be killed and eaten by victors.

Komodo dragons also possess virulent bacteria in their saliva, of which more than 28 Gram-negative and 29 Gram-positive strains have been isolated. These bacteria cause septicemia in their victim; if an initial bite does not kill the prey animal and it escapes, it will commonly succumb within a week to the resulting infection. The most harmful bacterium in Komodo dragon saliva appears to be a deadly strain of Pasteurella multocida, from studies performed with lab mice. There is no specific antidote to the bite of a Komodo dragon, but it can usually be treated by cleansing the wounded area and giving the patient large doses of antibiotics. If not treated promptly, gangrene can quickly develop around the bite, which may require amputation of the affected area. Because the Komodo dragon appears immune to its own microbes, much research has been done searching for the antibacterial molecule(s) in the hopes of human medicinal use.

Oh well, that's all the facts I can collect about this deadly species.

Here are some pictures if you are not familiar with this reptile:

Girls Day Out.

I went out with my girls today. Can't say much. I'm too sleepy. Oh well. Here's a picture of my girls. I'm not in it cause I'm the one taking the photo. Very unfortunate of me, huh? Oh well, I love my girls.

Nani 2007, I miss.

A few pictures of me back then in year 2007.

Last year's photos of me. I miss the old days. :'/

......

I am a complete significance of all insignificance. The perfection of imperfection. I'm being random actually. I'm hurt. And, all I could do is type down everything that is at the tip of my mind right now. I haven't been myself in a while. I haven't fully recovered after my Father's departure. He's never coming back :'(
My life has been nothing but miserable. Eversince my dad's gone, there's been a lot going on. I feel so pressured. I'm my mom's only hope. What more should I say about my brothers? They're hopeless, unreliable, selfish, irresponsible and spoiled. And because of that, my mom keeps encouraging me to be the very best for the family. I just don't want her to put her hopes on me too much. Don't get me wrong. I am willing to do all that. But I need more time. And that's not the only problem. My Father's siblings are fighting over the inheritance. My mom bought two lands in Tanah Jambu and Sengkurong for our future use. But it's unfair to my mom. She purchased those lands with her own money. She only included my dad's name as a sign of how much she loves him. And what's really unfair, they get 1/6 of the land's share and my mom only gets 1/8. It's unfair. It's my mom's property. Shouldn't they be ashamed of fighting over something that doesn't even belong to them. And they're even starting to nag my mom to sell our car to them. Ughh. I'm trying as hard as I can to be strong and hold on. Each day, I have to face all these predicaments. What better life should I be in?
Honestly, I admit. I fake a smile everyday. I'm a very sensitive person. But people don't know that cause I've always been mean and sarcastic. I have main reasons for being insensitive. So that people won't see me as someone who can get hurt easily. Not only that, I'm doing it to protect my feelings. I know, we all have limits. I'm an odd person. *sighss.
My life isn't all that perfect. I would consider my life perfect when I've fulfilled all my purposes in life. Oh, God. I guess this is the karma I get for being such an ass back then. This is the perfect punishment for me. I'm so close to giving up.
Sayang, if you're reading this, I want you to know that I love you. And in this sort of situation, you'll always be the person I need to talk to, to dry my tears away, to convince me that everything's gonna be alright. I love you, I truly do. :'/

I don't wanna lose you

I dedicate this song to you, baby. You know who you are. I love you :')

Stress kills

It's late, I'm supposed to be asleep by now. I'm kinda waiting for something. But I'd rather not mention it here. I had quite a day. ...Hmm.. Actually, No. Have you ever encountered that feeling of losing something or someone each day? If you do, quickly tell me what to do. So yeah, I made a new friend. His name is Ashraf Ahmad. Quite a nice guy. Quite a charmer. He's coming 26 years old and works at private foreign company. Well, that's what he told me. And he plays softball. That's nice. Anyway, I had my English Paper 2 and Maths Paper 2 this morning. It was alright. I came late to school and started the Maths test late. But thankfully, I managed to finish the paper on time. And again, something keeps bothering me. Tomorrow I'm gonna have both Combined Science Paper 1 and Paper 2.
All of a sudden I lost my mood in blogging. I miss that particular someone who isn't talking to me right now. :'(
Will update soon. Goodnight.

Exam Fever

Currently, I'm still in the middle of havin my exam. I have exactly six papers to go, then I'm free. Plus, I haven't gone out with my baby and my girls in a while. :/ Anyway, so yeah. As you all have noticed, I haven't been blogging much since last month. I'm blogging cause I'm bored and I can't sleep. Yesterday, I had my Art exam. Art Paper 1 and Paper 4. Paper 1 is still life drawing and observation. Paper 4 is based on imagination. I did a bit well in paper 1. I tried not to make it look so crappy. I started at 7:30 am and finished it around 9:45 am. All we had to draw was a banana, an apple, an orange, a flower and a piece of cloth. It was okay. We didn't have enough time to go for break so we just continued with paper 4. I drew a landslide. It took me approximately 15 minutes to finish drawing. I just used the abstract drawing method. While I was painting, I started thinking about my baby. I miss Ass. :( I got so moody I felt like leaving the class. Plus, it doesn't seem right. We're not supposed to do both Art papers on the same day. We can't get both inspiration within the day. It was like artistic suicide. So, in the end, my art looked crappy instead. I just don't like doing Art when I'm not in the mood. Instead, I prefer to study my pain away. I find studying quite effective when it comes to relaxing. Aaah. I miss Ass. Ass is probably asleep by now. I'm bored and I got noone to chat to. Which reminds me.. I have D Maths Paper 2 and English Paper 2 exam on Monday. I'm not that anxious. Maths and English are the easiest subjects. And then the next day, which is Tuesday, I'm going to have my Combined Science Paper 1 and 2. To me, Science subjects are also quite easy. I'm just not very fond of POA. It's one of the subjects I'm weak at. I hate it. Sadly, I have to do the Paper anyway which is on Wednesday.
Aahhh. I can't wait till its 4:21am. That's the exact time Ass proposed me when we first got together. It's our 11th Weeksary. :') Baby, Te Quiero Con Toda Mi Alma.
Oh well, I'm off. I have other things to update. Will update soon. Much much love. xoxo

Family Guy (Y)

I'm currently blank, but that doen't mean I won't be blogging. Heheheh. I was looking through some clips in youtube and I saw Family Guy's clips. I love Family Guy. Family Guy's super hilarious. Here's a short clip of Family Guy. Hope you enjoy watching it. :) For your information, I love Stewie!

An Unusual Lonely Night

Surprisingly, this is the first time I'm on my own without having my baby around. Ass is currently in Miri with brothers and cousins. I miss Ass. So, anyway, without Ass around, I never felt this lonely. And I hate being lonely because I seldom feel this way. Maybe that's why I do need to have friends around. I do have friends, but, I got caught up with Ass I didn't have time to spare with my friends. It's not Ass's fault. It's entirely mine. I just didn't know how to adjust my time between friends and Ass. God, I wish someone would understand what I'm going throuh. It's just not fair. So yeah, right now it's after midnight. I don't know who to chat with nor talk to since my baby's not around. Plus, I don't think I'm in much of a mood to chatter. *sighsss. I miss my pals. Haven't seen them around in a while. I hope they're doing fine, though. I just miss them very much. I've known them this year, but, we've been through so much. It's like, I've known them all my life. Eventhough I'm always mean, sarcastic and harsh to them, that doesn't mean I don't appreciate having them in life. For once, I mean it. These girls are my true BFFs. I thank Siti Nabilah Binti Rosli, Nabilah Hazirah Binti Haji Karim and not to forget, our dearest Piyawan Takamchai. Without their love and support, I wouldn't be the person I am by now. Forgive me for being a pain in the ass. I love you girls. :')

much much love

xoxo

My Long Time Interest

You might think I'm weird after reading this post but It's true. I've always wanted to do bungee jumping. *sighss. I'd like to do it someday before I die. I'm really into extreme and I love any sorts of outdoor activities. So yeah. Bungee jumping is an activity that involves jumping from a tall structure while connected to a large elastic cord. The tall structure is usually a fixed object, such as a building, bridge or crane; but it is also possible to jump from a movable object, such as a hot-air-balloon or helicopter, that has the ability to hover over one spot on the ground. The thrill comes as much from the free-falling as from the rebounds. When the person jumps, the cord stretches to absorb the energy of the fall, then the jumper flies upwards again as the cord snaps back. The jumper oscillates up and down until all the energy is used up. So, here are a few photos of people doing bungee jumping as reference:

As you can see, you can do all sorts of awesome manouvers which is most likely to be fun. I hope I'll get the opportunity to do this daredevil activity, and also considered as an extreme stunt, someday. Although, there are some risks to it. There is a wide spectrum of possible injuries during a jump. One can be injured during a jump if the safety harness fails, the cord elasticity is miscalculated, or the cord is not properly connected to the jump platform. In most cases this is a result of human error in the form of mishandled harness preparation. Another major injury is if the jumper experiences cord entanglement with his/her own body. Other injuries include eye trauma, rope burn, uterine prolapse, dislocations, bruises, pinched fingers and back injury. Age, equipment, experience, location and weight are some of the factors, and nervousness can exacerbate eye traumas. So, obviously, any slight mistake or miscalculation will lead to a certain death if not careful. :)

Side effects

I'm running out of things to type. My life isn't that much interesting, anyway.So yeah, I'm currently listening to this song titled side effects by Young Jeezy and Mariah Carey. You should listen it up. I love it. The song's not only awesome, so are the lyrics. I find it quite meaningful. So yeah. Enjoy.




And not to forget, here are the lyrics:

[Young Jeezy:]
It's M.C. and Y.J.
Another hit, OK
We lookin' fly, takin' off
Saw us on a runway
On any given Sunday,
Monday, Tuesday
They try to confuse me,
I never let 'em use me

I was a girl, you was a man
I was too young to understand
I was naןve, I just believed
Everything that you told me
Said you were strong, protecting me
Then I found out that you were weak
Keepin' me there, under your thumb
'cause you were scared that I'd become much
More than you could handle,
Shining like a chandelier
That decorated every room inside
The private hell we built,
And I dealt with it
Like a kid I wished I could fly away

But instead, I kept my tears inside
'cause I knew if I started I'd keep crying
For the rest of my life with you
I finally built up the strength to walk away
Don't regret it but I still live with the side effects

[Chorus:]
Waking up scared some nights still dreaming 'bout them violent times
Still little protective 'bout the people that I let inside
Still little defensive thinkin' 'bout me tryin' to run my life
Still little depressed inside, I fake a smile and deal with the side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)

Vacant inside, no one was there
Couldn't be real, had to keep quiet
Once in awhile, put up a fight
It's just too much, night after night
After awhile I would just lie,
You was dead wrong, said you was right
Did what I could, just to survive
Couldn't believe this was my life,
Flickering like a candle
Doin’ my best to handle sleeping with the enemy
Aware that he was smothering every last part of me
So I broke away and finally found the strength to leave

Still kept the tears inside
'cause I knew if I started I'd keep crying
For the rest of my life with you
I finally built up the strength to walk away
Don't regret it but I still live with the side effects

[Chorus:]
Waking up scared some nights still dreaming 'bout them violent times
Still little protective 'bout the people that I let inside
Still little defensive thinkin' 'bout me tryin' to run my life
Still little depressed inside, I fake a smile and deal with the side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)

Hey, hey, hey
Let's go!

[Young Jeezy:]
Hey magnifico or should I say magnificent?
Ain't nothing worth your happiness
And I ain't caring who you're with
Misery loves company so we ain't tryin' to hang with you all
Hurt you if you let 'em in
Gotta keep you sucker smilin'
Keep tryin' to play
I tell him I ain't blowin' though
Think they want me outta here,
I tell 'em I ain't goin' though
Side effects be drowsiness,
Loneliness,
How is this?
I think the call it hateration,
What can you prescribe for this?

Forgive but I can't forget,
Every day I deal with this
I live with the side effects
But I ain't gonna let them get the best of me

Forgive but I can't forget,
Every day I deal with this
I live with the side effects
But I ain't gonna let them get the best of me

Kept my tears inside
'cause I knew if I started I'd keep crying
For the rest of my life with you
I finally built up the strength to walk away
Don't regret it but I still live with the side effects

[Chorus:]
Waking up scared some nights still dreaming 'bout them violent times
Still little protective 'bout the people that I let inside
Still little defensive thinkin' 'bout me tryin' to run my life
Still little depressed inside, I fake a smile and deal with the side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)
Side effects (oh, oh)

Random topics to talk about in a conversation

A few minutes ago, I was chatting with two friends of mine, Nisa and Zats. And we were having this really really random conversation. It's funny! hahhahah. Thanks for the wonderful chat, girls. So it goes a little something like this:

Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:01 AM):
zaaaaaat, aku cyg kau.
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:01 AM):
astagafirullahalazim
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:01 AM):
nani aku cyg kau
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:01 AM):
ehex
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:01 AM):
Subuh subuh sudah ia be'download.
zatsofatso. says (5:01 AM):
bah bah, i lorvvvves youz toohX cyngX
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:02 AM):
ia liat porn
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:02 AM):
batal puasa
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:02 AM):
ahhh, thank you for loving me.
zatsofatso. says (5:02 AM):
apkan
zatsofatso. says (5:02 AM):
hahaha
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:02 AM):
I love me too
zatsofatso. says (5:02 AM):
aku baru jua uzur nich
zatsofatso. says (5:02 AM):
sakit my hips
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:02 AM):
*hugs myself
zatsofatso. says (5:02 AM):
hips dont lie
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:02 AM):
hahahh
zatsofatso. says (5:02 AM):
apakan
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:02 AM):
hahaha
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:02 AM):
apakan
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:02 AM):
ahahaha
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:02 AM):
aku inda sayang aku pasal susu ku damit
zatsofatso. says (5:03 AM):
taluuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:03 AM):
minum juice pagi pagi everyday
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:03 AM):
mau kan tu?
zatsofatso. says (5:04 AM):
eh that doesnt help
zatsofatso. says (5:04 AM):
picik saja susu mu atu pagi2
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:04 AM):
that does.
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:04 AM):
inda mau ah
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:04 AM):
hahhaha
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:04 AM):
kau picik awal ani kah?
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:04 AM):
hahahahaha
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:04 AM):
adakah
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:04 AM):
banar banay jua kau
NaniAZ iloveyou says (5:04 AM):
*banar banar
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:04 AM):
inda, susu ku gatal
zatsofatso. says (5:04 AM):
palui
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:04 AM):
haha
zatsofatso. says (5:04 AM):
hahaha
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:04 AM):
aku garu
Khairunnisa Nhdz. says (5:05 AM):
hahaha

Hahah. These girls are fun to talk to, so yeah. And I miss them both. :)

much much love

xoxo

Missing you

Recently, I'm beginning to like blogging. I've been so busy with other things, I didn't have the opportunity to enjoy the fun of blogging. Blogging is getting quite handy for me nowadays. Usually I'd write things down my journal, but this way is much more easier for me to type things down rather than writing things down. It's like as if I purposely made my life complicated. hahah. So yeah, I'm currently missing someone. I'll just name that someone as Ass. I've been with Ass for more than a month now. We have this weird kind of relationship unlike any other normal relationships. It's like I'm having a long distance relationship with someone who's not actually a long distance away from me. But the funny thing is, we never stopped loving each other. We had our ups' and downs' but we managed to work things out together. We just don't expose too much of our rellationship. It's kind of hard, but, I've managed to master it. So anyway, I miss my Ass right now. :( Ass can't go online because Ass has school tomorrow morning and has to get up early. Ass is an amazing person. People just can't see that the way I do. I love Ass to bits. Before I met Ass, Ass was a totally different person. In other words, Ass came from (N) and \m/ to (Y) and 8-I Quite amazing, isn't it? Ass would do anything just to impress me or make me proud. And I'm mighty glad Ass thinks that way. I am proud of Ass now. Ass has been keeping up with studies and everything. That's one hell of a major improvement for me. Ass even started doing maths and science. And those two subjects which I've just stated are my two most fevourite subjects. AWW. Isn't that sweet? Ass started doing things that I love doing. So that we can have same opinions about things and we can start to expand our interests on certain things or new things that we can go through together. If we don't agree on certain things, we'll just compromise and start doing other things. Noticed how willing Ass is when it comes to being around me? Ass would do anything just to spend a second with me. What I love the most about Ass is the fact that Ass never gave up on me. I remember the time when Ass first proposed me. Cute. I miss those times. Nowadays, I can't spend that much time with Ass anymore since my Dad is at the hospital. At least Ass managed to visit me at the hospital. :) Ass means a lot to me, so, whatever happens, we will always work things out no matter how hard things will get. Ass is the pride of my joy, the love of my life, the shining star that won't stop me from wishing, the asthma that's making it difficult for me to breathe (HAHA), the sun that won't stop shining my day. Baby, if only I could show you how deeply in love I am with you and how lucky I feel to have you in my life. Without you, I'd rather jump off the highest cliff. I love you. Truly I do. :') And I thank you for making my life a lot more meaningful. AndAss, forever!

Random Problems that I have to face.

Umm, I'm actually kind of clueless and I have no idea what to type down this very minute. I'm currently at the hospital all by myself and it's friggin' chilly! Even my teeth can't stop cluttering. And not only that, my body won't stop shiverring. I don't actually like being in low temperatures. So yeah, I've been at the hospital for more than a week now. My father is really really ill. I've never actually expected my dad to be this sick. I just didn't see it coming. Even as his only daughter, I don't know what to do to lift his spirits back up. My dad loves me and I just don't know how to appreciate that. I'm not that very closely attached to my dad eventhough we live under the same roof. He loves me, I know. He just has a different way of showing how much he loves me. Not only me, my other siblings as well. He's not the average dad that always buys his daughter chocolates, stuffed animals etc. He's different unlike any other dads. He doesn't show us his affectionate side. He's always mean and grumpy towards us but we know deep down inside, he's not like that. So anyway, back to the story. He's been staying at the hospital since Sunday(14th September). I'm here at the hospital because, I want to look after him at all causes. Now he's sound asleep, so, I took advantage of my free time blogging since I have no one to chat with at this late hour. You know, I thought the hospital is a healthy hygienic place to cure the ill. But I realised I was wrong. I was healthy when I first arrived here. And after just about a week of staying over at the hospital, I've become from physically healthy to sick as hell! I seldom get sick, so yeahh. Maybe it's because of the low temperature. So, anyway, recently, I've been having sudden flashbacks from the past. I was such a pain in the ass. I've been too stressed out as hell nowadays. And, the last thing I need is losing a relative whom I prefer to consider as my very own sister. With that, I highly believe that I am still a pain in the ass. Yes, Wani. If you're reading this, I'd like to say I'm sorry. I haven't changed and I do not wish to change for the sake of saving our friendship. I just need to learn how to divide my time between friends and my current relationship. I thought you wanted me to be happy. As someone who's closely attached to me like you, you're supposed to understand. Hmm. Doesn't matter. I bet you hate me by now. Neither things nor people remain the same. Like they always say, people come and go. I don't want my dad to go, so, I can tell that you don't want me to go either. Vice versa. I just need time to get used to all of this. It hasn't always be easy for me. I have a frown that usually disguises itself as a smile. I normally show how upset I am to people. But if you're close to me, you can trace lies of expressions and impressions and also, you're able to tell whether I'm upset, happy, miserable bla bla bla. *sudden sighs. I just realised I can't MC nor send my baby a text message. Nyehh. I hope my baby's at school now. I'm running out of things to type. I'll post something as soon as I have the time. :)

much much love

Nani♥

Hi, WANI♥

I LOVE SI WANI WAHHH! BOO, QAAHSSSSSS. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

:)

I love you, Nur Atiqah Binti Haji Kahar.

:)

Qahss

What I think about Qahss:
She's simple, pretty, ordinary with something a little bit extra. She's someone who you'd definitely rely on. I love her to bits. She's like an unsolved riddle that no one is able to solve. People just tend to crack her up like a piggy bank so taht we can get the jackpot. (Y) I'm not saying she's one of those friends that brings me any benefits.I mean, being her friend is already the benefit. Get it?
heheh. I haven't actually known heer that long, but all I know is, that I love her like how much I love dancing in the rain. She has that special attraction that can make everyone want to get to know her. Obviously, she's very pretty. Inside and out. ;) She's one of my top people. When I have either troubles or problems, she's not going to help you with it but she will cheer you up and give some tips about how to solve it. She's very helpful, kind and reliable. She has the elements of being a perfect friend. When she's around, I get loco cause...I don't know...She always shines my day with her hilarious jokes and sarcasms. She never fails to shine my day. She's someone I can talk to 24/7. But then, sometimes I do get tired whenever she poops during our conversation in msn. It's so annoying. I mean, she can be a killjoy sometimes. That's why. Haha. I still love her though. (L) Like, very very much. She's actually my niece, but, I don't see her as a niece. She's like a best friend I never had. I love her like my very own sister. I don't have sisters so, having her around means a lot to me. (Y) She's the bestest part of my life. I love you so much, Qahsssssssss!(L)(L)(L)(L)(L)(L)

Surprise Surprise

It was around midnight. I couldn't sleep as alwayssss. Until, someone IM'd me. To my surprise, it was Lina. I didn't think she'd actually chat with me in msn. hahah. And not only that, while we chatted, I discovered the fact that Lina and I have a lot in common. We're sensitive people. Don't mess with us! Esseh!! We chatted all night long, until, she got disconnected. So,I ran to the entertaining room and decided to play some video games. Therefore, I just left my phone in my room and took off. I'm partially considered as a gamer cause, I like to play video games, but at the same time, I like to spend my time outside and exploring. I can't just lock myself at home and play video games all day. That's like social suicide. I have a life, y'knowwwww. Haha. So anyway, back to the story. After I'm done playing, my eyelids felt a bit heavy. So, I guess it was time to hit the hay. When I got back to my room, I just found that Lina was back online the whole time and she IM'd me several timesssss. HAHA. As I turned to my left to look at the time, it was already around 4:30 in the morning. Haha. I replied her texts but, unfortunately, there wasn't any respond. So, I assumed that she was already asleep. Which leaves me, the last person left to go to sleep. I decided not to got to school today cause I haven't slept for three straight days and my mind's a bit messed up. If only I knew what's causing me like this. So anyway, I slept the whole morning. I wasn't aware of the surroundings at home cause usually, it'd be noisy and busy in the mornings. I guess I was really tired. I got up around 10:40-ish. And again, to my surprise, it was Lina. HAHA. She's been around quite a lot nowadays. I do like having the feeling of making a new friend. It's quite comforting. Especially when Lina and I are inlikes. Surprisingly, I'm going to miss her. She's about to leave this month on the 25th. I barely know her that much but I can tell that she's a great person. Honestly! So anyway, back to the story. We chatted for nearly an hour until she got disconnected again. Man, that girl just can't stay online, can she? hahahah. It was already around 12:30 in the afternoon. I texted my friend, Zyee, about our project cause we haven't actually finished working on it. So, we decided to go Gadong and did a small study conference. On my way to Gadong, a sudden loud beep startled me. It was my phone. It was Lina again. HAHA. Man! Hahahah. She was wondering if I was going out, so, I told her that I am. She was so upset. Dibawa berjumpa, inda mahu! Beulah benar! Hahaha. Lina was at Swensen at that time with her friends. So, Syiqah and I went to Swensen to meet her up. Heheh. She's changed. I mean in terms of appearance. HAHA. But she still looks pretty fine though. (Y) So yeah, we didn't stay long and chatted for only a short while. She seems pretty upset. I mean, from the look on her face. She needs some time out. Anyway, Syiqah, Zyee, Piya, Nabs and I took off to Cheezbox. We stayed for quite a while, like, about 2-3 hours till our asses felt sore. Haha. That's a bit new for the record cause we don't usually hang out in one area for hours. Nabs went home early cause she's a bit of a bore. Anyway, we got hungry and I was in the mood to eat Nasi Katok. So, we all went to thye's Foodcourt cause I love the Nasi Katok there. Grrr! Hahaa. We sat and ate at Thye's. And after that, we decided to walk around Gadong till we reached the Mall. We got a bit tired and went to Westreet. So we just sat and chilled. The connection was a bit sucky-ish, so, we moved to Chill. We're like a bunch of Nomads moving from one restaurant/cafe' to another. Haha. I have a funny feeling that I'm going to be stuck here in a while. I wonder how my end of the day going to be? That's for you to find out. Okay, I'm off. Some hippies are trying to ask for my number! Haha. That's just rarely odd, don't you agree? Haha. Okay. Till next time. I hope you enjoyed reading. :)

One interesting Saturday.

This Morning:
As you all notice, I'm a new user. Obviously, I'm so friggin bored. I didn't attend to school this morning. I couldn't sleep and I'm having these severe headaches and I had gastric so yeah. Whatever. I could barely move. Even until now, I still can't sleep. Pfft. It's quite funny actually. I was tired in the morning but when I stayed at home, I was completely energetic! hahaha. I missed my biology test and my Maths test. Silly, huh? I chatted with Wani in a bit cause I was in a rush. So I told her not to go offline until I get back online. She agreed blablabla. That wraps up about everything that happened this morning. :)

This Afternoon till evening:
Mama picked me up from home and sent me to Gadong. I was freakish-ly bored at home. I just sat at Chill all by myself cause I needed some alone time. That's what I always do. If I'm not in the right mood, don't talk to me, don't look at me, don't touch me. What I'm trying to say is, just don't bother me at all. People can clearly state a huge difference between me in my good mood or bad mood. As I got online, Wani wasn't in the right mood tah jua. It sort of made ke a lot more kusut. So, we talked a lot about some certain things. UNTIL, she invited me for a webcam session. Hahahahaha. I was so segan, man! Seriously. I'll make a short description about Wani. She's my niece and she's the best. She can actually tell the difference whether I'm smirking reluctantly or smiling. HAHA. She cracks me up everytime we start a conversation. I love her very much and she's one of the people that makes living a lot more reasonable. :) So anyway, we chatted batah batah until we saw tiqah online. We invited her in our convo ua. Unfortunately, Tiqah was busy pooping as always. HAHA. (sorry,qahh. I love you! :P) But last last, ada jua ia bah. Hahahaha. We had a lot of fun chatting chatting. Sadly, Wani had to go off earlier than us. So tinggal me and Qahs saja. HAHA. She actually helped me a lot with this blog. She had to do three things at the same time. 1) She had to help me with this blog. 2) She had to jaga baby nya ahh. Cute! 3) I tahan rasa mengantuk nya. Esehhhhh! hahahahaha. Then while chatting and webcam-ing with her and all, Menda, Nu and Ruby appeared from out of nowhere. I decided to come along with them. So I told Qahh ,"BRB." But as I got back online semula, nicknya "Nani, aku tidur dulu" kah apakah. HAHAHA. Aku atu hoping she'd still be online tapi inda! oh well. I don't blame her. Andang it was her nap time jua sudah wah. Iatah. Oh well, right now I'm stuck in Westreet with Putat. Selalu ni ia ani di Gadong. Pfft. HAHAHA. I'm still thinking ni. Shoul I go out wit Hafes later? Yes? No? I'm so confused with boys. I don't normally feel this way but it's kind of driving me crazy. Someone called me a player, a heartbreaker, a bitch. Pfft.Hey, one date doesn't mean I'd instantly fall in love! Palui eh. I ust need time wah. Oh well, that's about that for today, I guess. My life isn't all that anteresting but, I hope we can all learn something from this.

I miss WANI and QAHS!

They're the love of my life. :')

peace

xoxo